Fuck Jake.
And that's all there is to it :] He doesn't deserve me, I'm leaving him in the dust, this is the end of line, hast la vista baby, I wont be back, don't let the door hit ya in the ass on the way, this girl is long gone, I'm not your toy, erase me, I'm not a doll and this ain't a doll's house, don't tell me you love me, don't confess, do it alone, cry me a river, clarity, circle of life, the winner takes it all and I'M ON A BOAT BITCH!
Can you tell my ipod's on shuffle? Well it's time to make a Jake CD.
I called him and we talked. He's gone into his bishop; I'm going into mine. He apologized which I appreciate. But I realized as I talked to him that I have so much more to offer than he has to offer me. I'm tired of selling myself short. I will be everything I dream of, and that girl is much too good to drag his ass along with me. [After this blog I'm gonna stop swearing]
"Do or do not. There is no try." - Master Yoda
I don't want to drag myself down anymore. In order to organize my thoughts, I intend on making several lists. I'll begin with the list of everything I'm setting my goals to become.
Tricia's Ideal Self:
- Graduate with a Bachelors degree in Chemistry
- Hold a current temple recommend
- Participate in at least one Orchesis concert
- Weigh 125 lbs.
- Be accepted to a graduate Chemistry program in California
- Hold a career where research is a possibility.
- Become a spokeswoman for a Woman's Center or some type.
- Become scuba dive certified
- Learn to do a back flip on the trampoline
- Become proficient in research methods
- Go to Vegas for a weekend just for the hell of it
- Learn to surf [at least the indoor kind]
- Get good at snowboarding and own a board and boots.
- Own a chick bullet bike
- Be an inspiration
- Become personally acquainted with Jesus Christ
- Read the whole Bible
- Be consistent in attending an institute class.
- Sing in front of a real audience again
- Successfully pass Calculus 3
- Love myself
- Sport blonde hair for another Summer or two
- Paint my living room with a red accent wall, own mahogany furniture, and keep white couches.
- Own an American Eskimo dog.
- Collect comic books that I buy at yard sales.
- Throw a glass of water at my date and yell "You cad!"
- Ride the tallest roller coaster in the world [or a really really really tall one]
- Play on a rec volley ball team.
- Have you as my best friend forever and always
- Be your maid of honor at your wedding
- Spoil the crap out of your children
- Design a house for myself
- Vote in local and federal elections
- Be completely honest.
- Be fabulous in every way on this list and many more.
I want you to know that I love you; you have been the best friend I've ever had. I'll never leave you. And I have faith that Christ will never leave me. I know that the atonement is real, and I know that I will be clean again. I will do my best to serve the Lord my God.
Much love,
your very best chemistry major
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